X x x
I do not count mortal days
Under the roof of a chilled empty building,
I’m reading the Apostles’ words,
Words of Psalm-singer I am reading.
Sleet is fluffy, and stars turn blue,
And more marvelous is each meeting –
And in the Bible a leaf
On Song of Songs is sitting.
X x x
All year long you are close to me
And, like formerly, happy and young!
Aren’t you tortured already
By the traumatized strings’ dark song?
Those now only lightly moan
That once, taut, loudly rang
And aimlessly they are torn
By my dry, waxen hand.
Little is necessary to make happy
One who is tender and loving yet,
The young forehead is not touched yet
By jealousy, rage or regret.
He is quiet, does not ask to be tender,
Only stares and stares at me
And with blissful smile does he bear
My oblivion’s dreadful insanity.
X x x
Black road wove ahead of me,
Drizzling rain fell,
To accompany me
Someone asked for a spell.
I agreed, but I forgot
To see him in light of day,
And then it was strange
To remember the way.
Like incense of thousand censers
Flowed the fog
And the companion bothered
The heart with a song.
Ancient gates I remember
And the end of the way –
There the man who went with me
“Forgive,” did say.
He gave me a copper cross
Like my brother very own
And everywhere I hear the sound
Of the steppe song.
Here I am at home like home –
I cry and I am in rue
Answer to me, my stranger,
I am looking for you!
X x x
How I love, how I loved to stare
At the ironclad shores,
On the balcony, where forever
No foot stepped, not mine, not yours.
And in truth you are – a capital
For the mad and luminous
us;
But when over Nieva sail
Those special, pure hours
And the winds of May fly over
You past the iron beams
You are like a dying sinner
Seeing heavenly dreams
X x x
Ancient city is as if dead,
Strange’s my coming here.
Vladimir has raised a black cross
Over the river.
Noisy elm trees, noisy lindens
In the gardens dark,
Raised to God, the needle-bearing
Stars’ bright diamond sparks.
Sacrificial and glorious
Way, I am ending here,
With me is but you, my equal,
And my love so dear.
X x x
It seems as though the voice of man
Will never sound in this place,
But only wind from age of stone
Is knocking on black gates.
It seems to me that I alone
Have kept good health under this sky,
Because of this, that first I sought
To drink the deadly wine.
Parting
Evening and slanting,
Downward goes my way.
Yesterday in love still,
“Don’t forget” you prayed.
Now there’s only shepherds’
Cry, and glancing winds,
And the worried cedars
Stand by clear springs.
X x x
Yellow and fresh are the lanterns,
Black is the road of the garden at sea.
I am very calm. Only please, do not
Talk about him with me.
You’re tender and loyal, we’ll be friends..
Have fun, kiss, together grow old..
And light months above us will fly like feathers,
Like stars made of snow and as cold.
X x x
We aren’t in the forest, there is no need for calling –
You know your jokes do not shine..
Why don’t you come to lull into quiet
This wounded conscience of mine?
You possess other worries
You have another wife
And, looking into my dry eyes,
St. Petersburg spring has arrived.
With harsh cough and with evening fever
She will punish and she will kill.
Under the smoke on the river
Nieva’s ice is no longer still.
X x x
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