Recently I wrote about the illusion of control, and living with no goals.
What I’m still figuring out is what you do if you let go of the illusion of control, and plan as little as possible.
What’s life like without goals or plans? How do we deal with the chaos?
I don’t have all the answers, but I’m learning a lot.
I went to the World Domination Summit in Portland earlier this month with few plans. I had a speech to give, a couple smaller sessions to hold, a bike tour scheduled, a plane ticket and a hotel room. But the large majority of the weekend I left open, with no plans.
It was liberating. I didn’t mind giving the talks, and I loved the tour, but meeting unexpected strangers, hanging out with people I’d never met, going with the flow of the crowd – it was fun. I never really knew what was going to happen next, and that’s scary… but strangely freeing.
As I write this, I’m on a plane to Guam for a month, and I have tons of friends and family to see – they all want to hang out with Eva, me and the kids (and vice versa – we’re excited to see them). But other than a place to stay for two of the four weeks we’ll be there, we have no set plans. We don’t know what we’re doing for transportation, we don’t know what we’ll do each day, and I don’t know where we’ll be living the last couple of weeks. It’s scary, but I know we’ll be fine.
How do you live with the chaos?
You learn to embrace it.
Living Daily Without Plans
I try to schedule as little as possible, and I have no goals for each day. I wake up and ask myself, “What excites me today?” And each day that’s different.
Sure, there are obligations that I have to meet, but mostly those are things I’m excited about. The ones I’m not so excited about, I’ll still do – unless
I can avoid them.
But each moment I try to live consciously, in the moment, and ask myself… “What am I passionate about? And how can I handle each moment while being true to my values?”
I’ve been having an ongoing discussion about this with my friend Suraj, who lives in London and practices the Jain religion. He has clearly identified his values: friendship, appreciation, compassion, and equanimity. I love those values.
My value is compassion, which comes in various manifestations: love, kindness, empathy, gratitude. And every time a situation comes up, I ask myself, “How can I deal with this compassionately?”
I’m still learning how to do this. I don’t claim to have mastered it, and will probably be exploring this for years to come.
Why Plans are an Illusion
Living without plans might seem foolish, or unrealistic to most people. That’s fine. But if you want to be realistic, you should understand that the plans you make are pure illusions of control.
Let’s take a simple example. You have plans to write a report (or a blog post or a book chapter) and meet with a colleague or business partner today. The writing is supposed to happen at 9 a. m. and the meeting is at 11 a. m.
Let’s assume those things actually happen according to plan. Many days, other things will come up and the illusion of control is easily shattered. But some days we get lucky and the plans actually happen as we hoped.
So you sit down to write, as planned. Perhaps you’ve outlined your writing. But as you write, you think of things you hadn’t planned. You face problems as you think the writing through that you couldn’t have foreseen before you started writing.